Weinsteiin and other males

Who's next? Since Harvey Weinstein was outed as a despicable sexual harasser, extortionist, rapist, groper, exhibitionist and other indecent things, there has been no stopping the names added to this disturbing list of men who abused women and the list of women who were threatened, offended or violated. The latest list is of men who harassed, groped or violated other men or boys.

Where will it all end? Whoever knew anything about Harvey Weinstein before all this? People you would never categorize as offensive or boorish are apologizing for past actions. The top guy at NPR News has resigned over inappropriate conversations with women. Dustin Hoffman apologized for an incident 20-some years ago. Former President George H.W. Bush has apologized for patting women's derrieres a long time ago.

Almost as striking as these admissions is the lack of any apologies or admissions from Bill Clinton and Donald Trump — men against whom plenty of evidence exists of their misbehavior.

All of these revelations come as college campuses cope with changing mores and expectations in male-female relationships. Campus rape has become a cause that has caught the attention of the U.S. Department of Education. Under the Obama administration, the department ordered colleges to take action against sexual offenders (usually male) and to base consequences on "trials" that deny due process by limiting the burden of proof, denying the accused access to legal counsel and the right to cross-examine their accusers. Some colleges created strict rules regarding consent to sexual contact, extending even to written permission to engage in Act A or Act B. A Trump administration review of the Obama administration rules has sparked a firestorm of complaints and worries about "rape culture."

What can we conclude from all this? Has society suddenly become more libidinous? Have males suddenly become more sexually aggressive? This seems unlikely, even though the ubiquitous access to online pornography certainly must be having some impact on social mores and perceptions of acceptable behavior.

Maybe society should admit that men are naturally boorish, aggressive, hedonist and eager to take advantage of any opening they might find. In past generations, social mores and economic rules kept these male tendencies under control (at least somewhat). Women were expected to be prim and proper and to not enjoy sex. Marital sex (the only kind allowed) was a woman's obligation, not a recreational pleasure. Only men took pleasure from such acts, and they had no obligation of providing pleasure to their mates. Women were protected by rules about dating, which was always with a chaperone or a group that would harshly judge intimacy.

As society has relaxed its rules on male-female behavior and as women have gained equality in education and work settings (they constitute a majority of college students), the natural male tendencies face fewer barriers. Men have more private encounters with women, and some men — apparently a great many — take advantage of these opportunities.

Society is not going back to the Victorian era, so if men truly are boorish and aggressive, other ways must be incorporated to protect women. The first step must be for women to protect themselves by avoiding risky situations and by speaking out against any sexual discrimination, assaults or misbehavior (touching or offensive language). Most of the Weinstein accusers kept quiet for years, even decades, allowing him to continue his extortions. We must also distinguish between misbehavior, which is unacceptable and punishable by loss of job or social status or other consequences, and rape, which is a criminal offense with harsh penalties. If we can agree that all these acts are offensive and that the most egregious of them should be criminally punished, we can go a long way toward limiting misbehavior and the vulnerability of women.

Modern society will never again see women as fragile and helpless, not when they are leaders and managers and admired role models. The Victorian era's responses to sexual crimes — rape was punishable by execution or justifiable homicide, and consensual sex might be followed by forced marriage — are not coming back. A modern balance to the "battle of the sexes" will look realistically at both males' natural aggressiveness and females' independence and capabilities. That aggressiveness must be curtailed, and women's capabilities should be honored and encouraged.